Tootin’ Groot

This blog contains tongue-in-cheek humor. Some animals are just not a good fit in their adoptive homes, and we are grateful to have Groot back to try again.
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Groot has just been returned to Zoe’s. Because he poops. And also farts. The adopters “were not informed of his condition,” and really, we can’t expect them to take on this burden. Pooping creatures are THE WORST. We know it. Oh, do we know it.

Because we here at Zoe’s consider ourselves experts in smelly creatures, and we hate having our animals returned for silly reasons, we wish to offer some suggestions for those who have, want, or wish to avoid smelly cats.

If you have a smelly cat

keep-calm-and-sing-smelly-cat-5If you already have a smelly cat, and are determined to love and care for it – bless your heart! – here are some things you can do:

• Switch your cat to a high quality, low fibre food. Ask your vet about options for sensitive stomachs.
• Supplement with probiotics. These come in treat or paste form, and are available at most pet stores.
• Get a slow feeding bowl that makes it harder for kitty to gulp down his food. When dogs and cats eat quickly, they swallow more air, which can come out as gas.
• Offer smaller, frequent meals.
• Get a litter box with a hood.
• Clean the litter box daily, change litter frequently, and add in some good ol’ Arm & Hammer
• Try different litter types. Some are better at locking in odors than others.

Of course, if your cat is bloated, in pain, or has any other worrisome symptoms, give your vet a call. The call is free, and they can tell you if your cat needs to come in.

If you want a smelly cat

Groot may be smelly, but gosh darn it, he makes for pretty fashionable neckwear.

Groot may be smelly, but gosh darn it, he makes for pretty fashionable neckwear.

Apply for Tooty Groot today. But be aware that using the advice above will likely reduce his smelliness.

If you don’t yet have a cat, and don’t want a smelly one

Where there is poop, there could be unpleasant smells. Consider yourself warned. In order to eliminate the risk of adopting a smelly cat:

ASK the foster home if their cat poops. Better yet, include a no-pooping caveat in your adoption application. We promise we will never call you back.

RESEARCH pets that don’t poop. Maybe a cat isn’t for you. Popular choices for people uncomfortable with bodily functions include:

• Tamagotchisrock
• Rocks
• Furbies
• Aquarium screen savers

FOLLOW other people’s cats on the internet. You can still get that boost of oxytocin by looking at cute photos and videos. We suggest following Lil Bub, Grumpy Cat, and Garfi.

On a more serious note, Groot’s experience exemplifies why we have an extensive application process. We interview prospective adopters, call references, conduct home checks, and continue to offer advice and support after adoption. We do everything we can to place the right animals with the right people. But sometimes, adoptions still don’t pan out, for surprising and strange reasons. As one of our wise founders once said, “you can’t screen for crazy.”